Wednesday, May 25, 2011

A Pack of Undead Gnolls... on Dinosaurs

What's worse than gnoll slaver pirates riding dinosaurs? 

Undead gnoll slaver pirates riding dinosaurs. 

Scratch that. Have 'em ride undead dinosaurs. Ghoulish gnoll riding a skeletal triceratops? Yessir, I'll have some more of that please. But we can't just throw these badboys in anywhere! A terror like these is just begging for some kind of horrific story and setting to back it all up. Because really, if your starting point for the adventure is badass undead gnolls riding around on skeletal triceratops, then the boss has to be the gnoll necromancer-shaman riding on the back of a ghoul t-rex. You thought a t-rex was hungry? Think about how hungry he is when he hasn't eaten in several thousand years. 

We'd need a good, wide-open, sprawling jungle temple for this one. With plenty of Indiana Jones style deathtraps just waiting to be set off. 

And a pit full of snakes. Wait... Undead snakes. 

I think it's about time I cracked open my DMG2 and started applying some monster templates.


  1. Needs more cybernetics.

    Slaver Cybergnoll Pirates riding Undead Dinosaurs.

    Now we need something British. Doctor Who! Everyone loves Doctor Who. So they are slavers, but they trade in modified Daleks!


    Sex, sex sex, must get sex into it. Wait, I see a television commercial- There's this nude woman in a bath being served by Daleks that she bought from the Slaver Cybergnoll Pirates riding Undead Dinosaurs. That's great, great, but we need a doctor, got to have a medical opinion. There's a nude woman in a bath with a doctor--that's too sexy. Put an archbishop there watching them, that'll take the curse off it. Now, we need children and animals. There's two kids admiring the undead dinosaurs, and a dog admiring the archbishop who's blessing the Daleks. flavor's missing...make the archbishop Greek Orthodox. Why not Archbishop Macarios? No, no, he's dead... nevermind, we'll get his brother, it'll be cheaper... So, there's Archbishop Macarios....

  2. PS: Found your blog via the RPGBA, hadn't seen it before. Thanks!

  3. I knew I was missing something! Dyson, that has to be the best comment I've gotten anywhere on this blog. Ever! And yeah, long live the RPG Blogger Alliance!

  4. I totally challenge you to run a 4E version of Death Frost Doom. 8^D

  5. @ Confanity: after reading this review of that module

    I think i'll save my time and money, thanks.